2009

I hate the deafening silence. I can’t bear this numbness. Too many things to do, but nothing’s ever finished. Making promises only just to break it one by one. Failed miserably to welcome change. Now, struggling with unending routines and haunted by the secrets within.

When will this all end?

I yearn for a miracle. So extraordinary that you never want to turn back. Back to the old ways. I want to move forward and step to what is ahead.

But what’s keeping me back?

Memories? Pain? Old struggles?

Questions…questions…too many of them clouding my mind. Everything’s turned hazy. Nothing’s crystal clear anymore.

I’m near to losing heart. I’m tired fighting this battle inside. The glorious victory seemed more far away…completely out of my reach. Or is it?

I want to feel Him once again. I want my passion to be fired up again. I want to go to a higher level. Go deeper into His presence, to where He is.

I’m dropping everything. I’m going back to the basics. To what really matters most. Now, a path has been paved. The journey towards it would not be easy. I prepare myself for a new experience, a year of rich fulfillment.

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