God to the rescue.

I fell. Into a ravine of misery.

Darkness consumed the place. Light was unwelcome.
Sadness crept inside me slowly, and eat of the life that remains.
Weak. I was growing weak day by day. Every bit of my strength was drained.
Suffocated, I can’t hardly breathe. When I thought it would be the end of me.

He came to my rescue.

I heard a sound, a mighty sound. Incredibly, a faint glow of light can be seen out of the corner of my eye. The little glow made its way into the ravine, it forced itself inside until it became a beam of bright light. I saw a man. My eyes could not look at Him directly. He was the most glorious person a human eye can behold. I have to close my eyes because I might turn blind. He was reaching out His Hand, I can feel it. He was there reaching out for me. And with a gentle voice, He comfortingly whispered, “I came here to your rescue.” With that words, strength began building up in my body. Joy encompassed in my whole being. Hope opened my eyes and my ears. Life was completely restored. With boldness, I reached out for the Man’s hand. I trusted Him, He can do all things. He carried me out of the forsaken ravine. Feelings of gratitude overtook me. I could not contain the redemption I had experienced. The moment my foot touched the ground, I began rejoicing. I was full of bliss. This was the miracle I’ve been waiting for.

When I turned to face Him, He touched my heart and my soul. With His final Words, He disappeared. But I know He was not gone. He was still there just unseen, but felt.

Want to know what His final words were.

“You are healed through my love, and what my Son did on the cross.”

Up to this day, His words still lingered in my ears. For I know, He found a special place inside my heart. I would never forget that moment when He came to my rescue.

His Love will forever remain the reason of my salvation and redemption.


Eyes wide open

After 11 months of being asleep, I’m finally awake.

My eyes are finally fully opened.

They are not shut close anymore.

One advantage of being awake:

You’re aware of everything. Aware of the reality life has to offer.
Reality bites. It’s true. That’s the only reason it’s difficult for me to face it.

A few months back. I have been in a state of deep slumber. Very deep slumber. I could not wake myself up.

I only believed what my mind told me to believe. I was dreaming. I believed lies, petty lies. At least in that moment I clung to a vague hope of something wonderful. Truth was never elusive. It was clearly marking its presence. Clear as the water in the sea. I was forcing truth to be the lie and the lie to be the truth.

Still the truth will prevail. Although it hurts, I’m glad it happened. I’m finally alive and awake. I am still breathing. Everything is perfectly fine, except for my heart.

All I know is my Healer will come to the rescue. He will hold my heart in the palm of His Hands and bring restoration.

I am broken now, but He will make me whole. A miracle will happen. I believe it with all of my heart.

Pain is just temporary. But the gift of restoration my Healer will bring is forever.

Long time, no write…

If my blog was like a house, it would really look old, uninhabited, and spider webs would be found in every corner of its room. Well, this is the closest comparison I could ever come up with. My blog has been untouched for weeks. It almost felt like a decade had passed before I decided to put up a post again.

For this past few weeks, my mind has gone blank. Literally blank. I had many wonderful events to write about, I experienced a handful of good memories that it really excites me to post everything here on my blog. But somehow, the minute I touch the keyboard of my computer, everything I wanted to type just seems to fade into oblivion. It seems like every word I know, suddenly exits out of my ear. Now having this situation on my hands, I can’t come up with anything to write. Talk about having a writer’s block. Now the most logical explanation I can think about my dilemma is maybe my ‘inspiration juice’ had ran out.

Now let’s get to something important for me to write about, and for your sake, to read something with somehow a little sense enclosed with it.

How would I describe my life right at this very moment?

A roller coaster ride.

But the only difference is, I am experiencing more downs than with ups.
I’m not being pessimistic, but it’s how the way life is for me right now.

It doesn’t mean I’m out of luck, and for your information I don’t believe in luck at all. I just believe in God’s blessings. How should I say this? Everything around me is fine still, but what I feel is what I’m really concerned about. My emotion is at its lowest point. I can’t keep up with my mood swings. It feels like I’m in a boat in the middle of the sea with a storm coming up ahead. All the waves crashing on me, tossing the boat in all directions. That is what my emotions are doing to me, they are the waves in a storm. I’m not depressed at all. I’m just confused.

Having a life of mere routines everyday. Being busy juggling responsibilities thrown at me without having the satisfaction of accomplishing anything. I hope I could get out of this position real quick. I really don’t want to be here, who would?


I am broken.

And it’s hard to face You now.

With these regrets,

With this pain,

With everything within me.

Beauty cannot be found inside
What if this broken heart is all I have to offer?

Would You still…

Accept me?

and love me?

Oh Redemption come to my rescue. Predicament surrounds me.

The only way now is towards You.

Beautiful Irony

1:55 pm.

Written on my cellphone’s screen.

I shut my eyes again and stayed still on the bed.

After a minute had passed, I opened my eyes slowly. Still lying in bed, I just stared at my phone and at the time. 1:57 pm. The day is finished almost halfway before the night comes again. I got up. It already tires me just to get up. Before going down, I looked through the space where I can see the living room from upstairs. I saw that the television was on. My father’s watching some news. I scrambled my way downstairs just to reach the bathroom. I closed the door quickly, trying as much as possible not to make any noise. I sat down the toilet. 5 minutes had passed, and I was just sitting there. Not moving at all. I was blankly staring at my nails. Nothing was on my mind, or on the other hand, I was refusing to think at all. Maybe if someone saw me, they would think I’m crazy. I have classes at school today, but last night I decided I would be absent again. For the past months, I was not attending school regularly, I constantly absented myself. I don’t care if this habit of mine would affect my grades. All I care about is myself and what I want. Some people may think I’m plain lazy, but it’s not true. I just wanted to stay home. Where I feel really safe. The outside world scares me. I’m not comfortable when I’m outside. Everyday, I dread that something bad would happen to me, that would hurt me and make me less and less happy. I may sound like a kid, a very immature person, but it’s true. I’m turning 18 next month, but I’m still scared of petty things. I was always unsure of what the day would hold for me so I always retreat to the place where I don’t feel any anxiety, my home.

As I am writing, I’ve realized.

I need CHANGE.

I can’t go on like this for the rest of my life. I should not ran away from problems and fears, but I should face them. Bad things always happen, but good things do too. But unless, I took the risk to take on the challenge ahead of me, then I would see the beauty the day has to offer me.

Change is a process. But change only starts when we decide for ourselves that we really want it, and are determined for it to happen. And I know who can bring real change in our lives.

He’s God.

The true Reformer of our ways.

If you surrender your all to Him, He’ll surely bring change in your life. He will form you in the best way and at the end of the process, you’ll see beauty in what He did. Like when a potter creates beautiful pots out of formless clays of mud. Change can be difficult and painful. It doesn’t assure us of comfort. But the Bible says, there is always a present Comforter for all of us, the Holy Spirit. Rest assured that beautiful, good, and great things is planned for us.

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